lesson #1—dealing with rejection

How do we handle rejection? When we don't achieve what we set out to do, it's hard not to take it personally. Beyond being rational and understanding that hiring processes involve expectations on both sides, emotions can play a significant role in trying to understand why we are rejected.

Seeking a new job opportunity or entering a new field can be (and often is) a frustrating, lengthy, and exhausting process. Maintaining motivation can be challenging, but sometimes a change of perspective is what we need to keep moving forward.

How can we view rejection as an opportunity for improvement? These situations offer many learning experiences, and I am no stranger to rejection; so let me share some of the things I've learned over the years.

First and foremost, allow yourself to feel what you're feeling.

Let's be honest about the situation. Rejection is tough. When we embark on a new process, we tend to place many expectations on the opportunity that presents itself. It's 100% normal for emotions such as sadness, demotivation, anger, and disappointment to arise. Allow yourself to go through them; don't try to avoid them.

Ask for feedback from your recruiter.

Once we've processed the emotions that come with rejection, a good idea is to sit down and think about what aspects of the process we can improve. For this, the feedback from your recruiter is crucial. Not all companies will be willing or able to provide feedback, but it never hurts to ask. The further you advanced in the process, the more the company got to know you — and that's when feedback can be very helpful. How to ask for it? Something like "(...) I wanted to know if you could provide feedback on the process so that I can take it into account and use it to become a stronger candidate in the future" is a good way to approach it.

Reflect on the process — give feedback to yourself

In addition to external feedback, do a self-evaluation and take some time to think about how the process went. What did you do well? What could you have done differently? What skills or knowledge can you acquire/improve? Reflecting on what you've learned will help you grow and avoid repeating the same mistakes in the future.

Keep betting on yourself

Maintaining the desire and energy to keep pursuing what we want and believe we deserve is difficult, but one thing that helps is understanding that rejection is often just redirection. Take what you've learned and continue on your path. It's a matter of trusting that good things will come, and it may take longer, but it will happen. Have faith in the redirection towards what is meant for you.